i read your post about fred. what my siblings and i are going through is hard, yes, but my parents have had good, long lives prior to losing any cognitive function. what is happening to fred carries an extra tragic sting for his loved ones.

thanks for the vibes. i'm projecting some fred's way too, both for him and for those close to him.

btw, i also meant to say...i can totally relate to what you said about not knowing what to say to fred when you see him socially. my parents are both at that stage where they can't really offer anything new in a conversation, can't ask probing questions or take a conversation in an unexpected and interesting direction. they are pretty much restricted to the formulaic forms of social discourse. "how have you been?" "what's new?" "what have you been up to?" etc. it's hard, when i talk to my parents on the phone, because i want to sustain the contact, have a real conversation, but they just can't sustain their end anymore.