class diet

i don't have a lot of time right now, but i wanted to post a link to this article about the cost of healthy eating vs. the buying power of food stamps. this phenomenon is one of the things i'm trying to address in my dissertation: the ways in which bodies (embodied subjects) materialize at the articulation points of various forms of hierarchically structured social difference. that's a jargon-y way of saying that systems of privilege and power reproduce themselves, ensuring continued privilege and power for the dominant group(s)--written in and on the very body of the classed subject. (could also be a raced or a gendered subject--and obviously these factors combine in various ways. nobody is only raced, classed, or gendered, after all.) in this particular context: economic class determines access to "healthy food," with lower economic classes forced by affordibility factors to eat food that's more likely to contribute to obesity, diabetes, cardiovascular disease, etc. the difference in embodiment, in turn, reinforces the privileged position of the "healthy" body. what would it mean, what would it look like, to resist this particular determination of embodiment and class privilege? it's an ironic question: in this case, resistance seems to require class privilege. or radical change...

ideas i would like to flesh out further...pun absolutely intended.

*sigh*

now the nurse practitioner i see for primary care and annual exams doesn't like the sound of my heart, and wants me to have an echocardiogram sometime soon. i've had a heart murmur for a long, long time; she thinks it's more pronounced now than it has been previously. naturally, i've been worrying about that all afternoon.

my body is falling apart! i just internalize stress badly, i think...turn it against myself instead of dealing with it productively. either way, i need to reduce the stress in my life, and refuse (continue refusing, i mean) to take on things that make it worse. i should say that not all stress is created equally, in my case--some kinds of stress are energizing and make life interesting. i guess that kind of stress is called "excitement," and can be opposed to "worry" or even "anxiety."

i need to schedule my first mammogram, too. the CT scan of my abdomen is set for february 20th. hopefully today's pap test will come out ok.

this week: i need to look into taking up either yoga or meditation, to help me learn how to manage *all* kinds of stress better.