eat light:

one example that comes right to mind is my online dating experience. soooooo many men in the 40+ age bracket are looking for women who are significantly younger than they are. it's disgusting. i once had a really nasty email conversation with a guy who was 48 and listed an upper age limit of 37 in his "what i'm looking for in a date" criteria. i asked him about it, expecting that he would say something like "oh, i just picked numbers out of my butt. they don't actually mean much to me." instead, he laid out a rather extensive argument defending this aspect of his criteria, explaining that women over 37 are "too focused on having a baby *right now*" and "too set in their ways." i.e. they are not as willing to bend themselves to his will, priorities, and lifestyle as a younger woman would be. i thought...WTF????? mind you, this is a guy who clearly considered himself at least lefty- and feminist-friendly. he responded to my ad, after all, in which i described myself *explicitly* as both of those things (also id'ed myself as an academic and union organizer); and he described himself as "progressive" in his first email to me. it was so offensive. i wrote back to him that his attitude seemed really agist to me--and that i was actually approaching my 38th birthday, i.e. my "expiration date" according to his criteria. he responded that i was being very close-minded. i, of course, told him he was a fuckwad who should go get bent.