i kid you not...

[arguchik]

yesterday i read a columnist's critique of joe biden's use of the particular word "articulate" to describe barack obama, connecting that usage to the thinly-veiled racism within such "congratulatory" white liberalist discourse. today i can't find the column again, or i'd post a link. it was a very interesting piece. i bring it up because like an hour after reading the editorial--i kid you not--i was riding the bus and chatting with someone i know from campus. he (a white man) was on his way to meet with charles johnson, a professor in my department, world-renowned scholar, novelist, essayist, cartoonist, mcarthur "genius" award recipient, and also a black man. my bus riding interlocutor said he couldn't wait to meet with johnson, and expressed a wide-eyed, amazed admiration for him, saying, "he's sooooo articulate! it's just amazing how well-spoken he is!"

was this just some weird coincidence? i felt deeply uncomfortable, and wanted nothing more than to exit the conversation. the thing is, i'm sure this guy genuinely does admire prof. johnson, and probably espouses progressive political views about various kinds of social justice. he is also the product of a society structured in dominance along the axes of race, class, gender, and sexuality, and as a straight, white male from an upper class background, he has access to privilege whether he wants it or not, whether he's conscious of it or not. as a (mostly) straight, white, overly educated female from a middle class background...so do i.

stuff like this makes me feel a kind of despair, and a wariness of opening my own mouth. what unexamined, privileged assumptions and presumptions lurk in my brain, haunt my speech? is there time, in a lifetime, exhaustively to unearth and sift and critically examine, reread, revise, rethink my entire psyche? no...and to try would be narcissistic. it's not about speaking, it's about engaging in conversation, which requires listening and hearing, letting go of power (which is not the same thing as disavowing it, denying its existence or my access to it, my role in reifying it), being open to potentially painful critique and transformative processes i cannot control.

Comments

[arguchik.livejournal.com]

thanks for writing, and for friending me! (i'll friend you back momentarily...and then i'll spend some time getting up to speed on your LJ.) you interested in the labor movement? live in seattle?

as for the post...yeah, i'm not so cautious that i feel socially paralyzed or anything, and i recognize that nobody will ever be perfect, least of all me. (i'm really not a believer in the whole concept of "perfect" anyway, because it just doesn't make sense to me. perfect for what? at what? in what geographical, historical, cultural context?)

and yes, charles johnson apparently does (or has done) some cartooning--at least he was introduced as such, at a talk i attended last fall. i haven't looked at any of his cartoons, though...so i couldn't speak to the genre, or suggest where to find them, etc. have you read any of his other work?

[rojonoir.livejournal.com]

My wife got an MFA in creative writing at the UW so I heard a bit about him through her, and I may have been to a reading of his years back. But, yeah, hadn't heard about him and cartoons.

Yep, I'm a wobbly in seattle. I've stepped back a bit once I had kids and much less time, but now that they're older (3 and 1) and sleep and time are coming back, I'm starting to get more involved.

[arguchik.livejournal.com]

a wobbly, really? that's cool!

when did your wife do her MFA? i'm wondering if i know her...i've been at UW (in the english dept, lit/cultural studies track) since 2001. i was pretty good friends with the cohort of MFA'ers who started that year, too--went to castalia, etc. i keep in touch with some of them.

[rojonoir.livejournal.com]

She finished in '96 - but you might know a couple of her friends that got their PhDs more recently, Ann Tandy and Bryn Gribben.

[arguchik.livejournal.com]

i know bryn, and i know who ann is. ann finished her degree before i started the program, but i think she was still in the area during my first year here (academic year 01-02). i sort of remember meeting her at one of bryn's parties--the "final pants" party--but that might have been someone else (whoever it was, she was wearing the coolest pantsuit EVER--i still remember it. funky, vintage early 70's.). bryn dated a friend of mine for awhile (i briefly dated him too). she's in missouri now, yes?